The point is this: whatever you’re into, it’s out there.
If you want to have a threesome in a pool of custard with two people dressed as robots, then you’ll find those people online.
However, it also makes it easier for us to close ourselves entirely to the potential of ‘non-ideal’ candidates, some of whom may like hats and smoked bacon but be great anyway.
Depending on what you’re looking for online, this can be problematic because, interestingly, we are terrible at knowing what we actually want, and should really have a lot less faith in our criteria.
About three years ago, I was sitting with a female friend in a bar on a frantic Saturday night in Dublin.
By the end of the night, several worse-for-wear men had wandered in our direction and attempted – some more ably than others – to strike up a conversation.
It softens rejection and allows us to get away with behaviours we wouldn’t engage in if the technological medium weren’t there to protect us from people’s reactions.
In the real world, a man who walks up to almost every woman in a bar and shouts ‘SEX?
’ in an enquiring tone would be interpreted as undesirable at a minimum, and certainly go home alone.
Slightly embarrassed at the prospect of admitting in a public sphere that I would actually like to meet a man, I’d put off signing up to dating apps.
But I’d had enough of weird, often obnoxious strangers.One in four relationships now start online, and that number will only increase.